“How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” – Winnie the Pooh

I’ve had the best feeling in the whole world for a while now. It’s really hard to put into words. It’s like I have so much happiness that it’s all going to burst out of my chest, it’s almost painful to contain. I think of this feeling like the calm after a storm, I’ve had a tough few weeks emotionally and looking back, there’s so much that I’m blessed to have. Today, I wanted to write about my friends, an aspect of my life I haven’t truly reflected on until only recently.

Truth is, back in the beginning of high school, I never felt like I had what some people would call a ‘squad’.  Sure, I had friends but whenever they were laughing together or making plans, I felt like I was just an observer, almost like there was a glass case between us. This was actually the leading cause of my depression back then, I didn’t feel like I connected to anyone or that I belonged. All I did was cry over the fact that  I wanted my friends to be exactly how I wanted them to be. Of course, it was silly but problems like these seem to be almost world destroying to a tiny fourteen year old.

Fast forward the day of my graduation, you’ll find a still pretty tiny Basant nearly crying during her graduation speech due to the sheer sadness of saying good bye to her classmates. Never thought I’d be saying this but through my pursuit of several passions like Model United Nations and Journalism, I found people who cared for the same things I did. Graduation kinda terrified me because of this, the prospect of losing people I love and came to dearly know scared me a lot.

Well, I started writing this in hopes of it being a nice and positive salute to the lovely individuals in my life and I don’t think I’m doing a good job. What I’m trying to say is although I never expected I’d find anyone who perfectly fit this exact cookie cutter definition of my ideal friendship, I did and in the best way possible. Over the years, I’ve learned to love people for who they are. I’ve learned unconditional love. I’ve learned that if I continue to imagine these ideal movie friendships I’d only be left disappointed. I gained far more than I thought just by changing my attitude and that was the gift of a friend.

Since then I’ve experienced some wonderful times with others. Ice-skating, playing in snow, loud singing with a ukulele, movie nights, adventure, dinners. Truly precious memories that I wouldn’t exchange for anything. My senior year and my first semester would have been insanely bland without the presence of the people I love, y’all know who you are <3. Friendship is a beautiful gift that I have come to appreciate immensely, it’s made me a better person everyday. Thank you.


 

To all those that have been reading my blog, whether you’re a new reader or a fan, thank you very much! I consider you an extremely important aspect of my life, almost like a friend, although I might not know you. I’d like to say: I hope you have a lovely day ahead of you!

Tiny Potato

Advertisements

42 thoughts on “The Gift of a Friend

  1. Yes, I understand everything you are saying. I was one of those, sixty-five years ago, so times haven’t changed. Even now in my seventies, I have learnt to accept people as they are, but I can’t make a very close friendship. I’m quite happy living with my husband, visitors make me very nervous, the truth is I’m happy when they have gone.
    Wish I could be different, but something is stopping me from making close friendships with anyone.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. It is very relieving to know i am not alone on this thought. I hsve been called a loner slmost all my life, even i know i am a wallflower more often than not… it breaks me, disturbs me, to know i cant sustain great friendships like everyone else around me– yet even more disturbing that much as i try to change it, there is very little i can do about it. I guess in the end, we are who we are.

      Liked by 2 people

    2. I can relate, I am married to a lady just like you and while I can’t pretend to understand fully, the last forty-four years of marriage taught me that (a) you can’t and shouldn’t try to remake people the way you want them and (b) she couldn’t be better for me if I could have. Happiness come from within, not from who you know, what you’ve done, or what honors you may or may not have been given. Love ceases to be unconditional when we impose rules.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. My experience is our need for a certain type of friend may evolve as we learn more about ourselves. Sometimes the number of friends may decrease because we find we may need less of what we desire in others. Having the “Gift of a Friend” is a fine treasure. I like that you have learned to embrace others where they are because each individual has a little something special to deposit along the way. The saying is true, some are in our life only for certain seasons, some will stay, some will go. The most important thing is to know who you, so you can discern whether friends are for seasons or to stay…. thanks for reminding us how valuable friends are to us.

    I appreciate you taking time to visit my blog and provide your observation.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Lovely post Bastants, and even more, lovely picture and post. I am glad somehow along your journeying, you found people you could well relate with. People that made you feel appreciated, and people you could appreciate too… that is such a liberating experience. I am immensely happy for you, and share your sadness of having to lose them after Graduation. I am certain you’ll find ways to keep in touch, nonetheless. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hi there. I cannot even begin to describe how I relate to 14 year old you except that it lastep well into the end of high school and is an ongoing battle that I’m still dealing with. Its so mature that you have recognised the fact that you need to accept people for who they are and not what you want them to be. I’m just starting out and would appreciate some feedback on my first ever post of you have time 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I see, you shouldn’t worry about it considering you know you have that issue you need to figure out, that’s a huge step! A lot of people I know are going through the same thing, so I completely understand. I checked out your blog right now and the link through your username took me to a deleted site? Thanks for the comment again!

      Basant She

      Like

      1. I think you’ve grasped something very important about blogging already: “Well, this blog is whatever I want it to be and whatever I feel is important.” and that’s great! Always remember that you you blog to express and not to please 🙂 I really enjoyed your introduction post and thought it flowed really well. I’d say the only thing worth pointing out from my end is that the post was teensy bit too long for my liking. Good luck with everything, keep doing you, and I hope you have a lovely rest of the day!

        Basant She

        Liked by 1 person

  5. How fast times have gone by right? We are the same age so I can definitely relate to the transition from high school to college. I left my home town behind and came to a new place to learn, grow and discover myself. Blogging has really given me a forum to express myself and what I believe in. I love every one of my readers too. I know you will do great things in University that will be even better than high school. High school was fun but it is so restricted in terms of what friends you have, a little building, and a narrow mindset. You explore yourself the next 4 years so let’s make the most of it, you and I! Good luck Basant!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I find really awesome when I meet someone who’s the same age as me and can relate to something I’m going through! Thank you for commenting about your situation, I can definitely understand everything you’re talking about and I agree. Cheers to the both of us, Rafa! I wish you luck with everything as well 🙂

      Basant She

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I loved your post on friendship! It took a long time before I met my ideal friend, but then I did and she’s a soul mate to me, so I completely understand the feeling of gratefulness for having found the beautiful gift that is friendship. Have a wonderful day, lovely!

    Sacha

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so so happy for you! It’s the best feeling having someone you know will stick by you through thick and thin. It was lovely popping by your blog and thank you so much for passing through mine as well and leaving a comment!

      Basant She

      Like

  7. I love this post. Unconditional love is special and needs to be cherished when it’s found, where it’s found and just as it’s found. When you try to amend it or apply rules unconditional love it is no longer unconditional..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for always commenting Robert 🙂 I completely agree! Trying to amend and rule a friendship is what I’ve always been doing, unconditional love has really set me free in a way 🙂 Have a lovely day!

      Basant She

      Like

  8. Friends are a gift. In Scott Peck’s “Road Less Traveled” few are fortunate to have more love to share outside their family. If you are one of those few, you are blessed. Friends are an investment in yourself as well as them. You are there, dear. I am 61 years old, an introvert with anxiety, and I have been blessed to have a wonderful friend. Thank you for your blog.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. That is very true, the gift of friendship is a blessing. I’m very happy to hear that you have a wonderful friend, it must be such a lovely feeling considering the worth of a bond. Thank you very much for sharing and the comment, have a great rest of the day!

      Basant She

      Liked by 1 person

  9. Wow you have explained in your writing my exact thoughts. I have always and still do have trouble finding people to connect with or people who get me. I’ve dealt with this same issue today so when I came across this it hit home. Thank you.

    Liked by 3 people

  10. I find my long-term PTSD requires acknowledgment and strong determination to manage your life. I spent my adult life in therapy treatments until diagnosed as PTSD and am now solely focused on my self-care.My care is EMDR therapy to re-pattern the brain paths currently tied to the fright and flight adrenal response which, when triggered, removes me from the present and I’m in a mental fog that puts my life in slow motion. With the fog is apprehension, fear and anxiety. I use tools like prayer, meditation, rest, relaxing activities and repeat them all until eventually, sometimes a few days later, I come back to the present. This is debilitating and I miss out on so much around me when the PTS has to be managed.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with PTSD as well as your tips in handling it. I definitely can relate considering my anxiety really wears me down and can have me missing on a lot of what happens in my life.

      Basant She

      Liked by 2 people

  11. Glad to have stumbled upon your blog. You’ve been through quite a lot and I can definitely understand why the bonds you’ve created with your pals are so important.

    It’s precisely when we have found people who mean so much to us that we find it hard to let go. We’d do anything for these people. Interesting how the human mind works don’t you think? Lol.

    Anywho, powerful quote from Winnie the Pooh there. Awesomely utilized and great post. Thanks for writing and sharing it!

    Your friend,
    Benjamin

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for reading along and liking so many of my posts 🙂 It truly is funny how we will get out of our way for a few folks 🙂 Winnie the Pooh has beautiful one liners and quotes like these that just capture emotion like this in the best way possible, I really do enjoy putting quotes like that on my blog 🙂
      Thank YOU for all your support, I really do appreciate it!

      Basant She

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Npm bud! It’s no surprise that many people love that yellow chubby honey-loving bear. He always sound so high though hahaha!

        If you ever do post more like this, and wish to share it with people, feel free to share it on the PBIY Community!

        Just let me know. If it can really help others’ enrich their lives somehow (Our mission!) I’ll make sure its up there for everyone to read. Awesome.

        Alternatively, if you use facebook yourself, feel free to go to our community page to share it! We are a newly established community that strives to make a difference in the lives of others and you seem like one who’d be able to contribute a lot so I’d love to have you with us if you choose to join 😉

        No obligation, just do so whenever you wish to. Let me know yeah?

        Your pal,
        Benjamin

        Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s